'Hot' Dogs and Guns

Oklahoma Town Halts Prairie Dog Poisoning -- LAWTON, Okla. - The city agreed to stop poisoning prairie dogs, whose antics have attracted tourists to local park, after outraged residents came to the rodents' defense.

"This is a real relief to me." says City Parks Worker Jason Freely. "Those little buggers are smart and I was running out of ways to poison them. After a while, they were becoming . . . I don't know . . . I guess you'd call it distrustful. They'd be, like, checking the seal on the Prairie Dog Chow bags and smelling their beverages. It would have been a lot easier to just shoot them with a shotgun or wack them with a club when they stuck their little heads out of their holes (like in that game, you know?)."

"Sometimes," he continued, "I think they were trying to poison me back. Stuff''s been tasting funny and stuff. Here . . . does this sandwich smell O.K. to you?"


Bin Laden 50 Today ? -- SPIN BOLDAK, Afghanistan (Reuters) - Osama Bin Laden, if he's alive, celebrates his 50th birthday on Saturday, and his friends in the Taliban prayed for his long life.

The rest of us -- not so much.







Appeals Court Overturns D.C. Gun Ban -- WASHINGTON - A federal appeals court overturned the District of Columbia's long-standing handgun ban Friday, rejecting the city's argument that the Second Amendment right to bear arms applied only to militias.

In a 2-1 decision, the judges held that the activities protected by the Second Amendment "are not limited to militia service, nor is an individual's enjoyment of the right contingent" on enrollment in a militia.

The U.S. Court of Appeals for the District of Columbia Circuit ruled that the city cannot prevent people from keeping handguns in their homes. The ruling also struck down a requirement that owners of registered firearms keep them unloaded and disassembled.

The decision marks the first time a federal appeals court has struck down a portion of a gun law on Second Amendment grounds.

"Who knew?"

"Who knew?" wondered Mayor Adrian Fenty. "Right now, we are wondering what else this Constitution thingy has to say. Up until now, we've been just going by what the media has to say about stuff. Now, we're wondering what else they've gotten wrong."

"Imagine that," he continued, " . . . the right of the people to keep and bear arms, shall not be infringed. Lordy!"

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