Wednesday, January 14, 2009

The Cosmic Joke

Somebody is goofing on us. Mankind is the pinnacle of evolution (so far). We are the masters of our domain. Yet, we are the quintessential example of non-selective breeding in a world obsessed with selective breeding.

Why?

Because men can't keep it in their pants and women can't help themselves. (Pretty much the same excuse but, somehow, women get to take the moral high ground on this one.) And no matter how carefully we plan, how well we are taught (or coached), no matter how many bad examples life throws in our paths, we still make bad choices. We know better. We may not have started out knowing better but by now we pretty much know the score.

Which got me to thinking. Why aren't we, by now, living in a Utopian society where each of us has our ideal mate, our children are guaranteed to be brilliant and beautiful, where sex is mutual, compatible and plentiful and where jealousy is merely a concept?

It is because we are blessed (or cursed) with two traits that have no business being together. Cognitive Reasoning and a Sex Drive. Simply put, we are so damn sure we can get laid on our own terms that we are constantly being blindsided by what's available.



The animal world does not have this problem. The males will hump anything and, when the bitches are in heat, pretty much the whole neighborhood shows up. Not that we don't know people like this but, then again, we aren't all blessed with the same amount of cognitive reasoning, either. Hell, dogs don't even need other dogs. They will hump your leg or a teddy bear with equal abandon.

On the flip side, a lot of people can't wait for their cognitive reasoning to kick in so that was why nightclubs and alcohol were invented. Also, in another soon to be well know internet fact, batteries were invented by a woman. War was invented by men to make themselves look good look so that they could get as many women as possible with as little discussion as possible.

In short, our Sex Drive will always trump our Cognitive Reasoning. Which is why, even though we may be at the pinnacle of evolution, we are definitely the results of non-selective breeding.

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