Group Life Insurance

I received a piece of bulk mail from AAA today. They were offering up to $200,000 of group term life insurance (for just pennies per minute). Now, I'm not really in the market for life insurance because I have always viewed death as a last chance to be a burden on my family. But even still, something intrigued me about this offer.

So, being the troublemaker, er... wiseguy, er... thorough person that I am, I read the fine print.

It turns out that in order to collect on group term life insurance, the entire group must die at the same time. So, figuring, "what are the odds of that?" I decided that anyone who signed up for group term life insurance would be stupid to die before the rest of the group so, demographically, it must be a pretty safe group.

So I signed up.

There are a couple of codicils, however. The policy is voided in the event of group suicide. But it does pay double indemnity in case of group accidental death. So, if we all decided, as a group, to kill ourselves, we would have to make it look like an accident. Like a tragic group bowling accident... or, say, we were all in a giant rowboat during a tornado. Or maybe a group hunting accident.

All in all, it was a pretty good mail day.

I will, however, have to re-think that age old question my mother used to ask me, "If everybody jumped off a bridge..."

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