The Wife Whisperer

A wife whisperer is a friend of the family who adopts a sympathetic view of the motives, needs, and desires of women, based on natural attractions and modern female psychology. The term goes back to the mid twentieth century when a neighboring farmer, David Cathcart, made a name for himself in England by rehabilitating wives that had become vicious and intractable due to neglect, accidental trauma or just plain restlessness.

Cathcart kept his methods secret, but people who managed to observe him noticed that he would stand face to face with the troubled woman. They seemed to think that he must be saying something to her in a way she could understand and accept because the women were quickly gentled by his mysterious techniques. Sometimes he would practice his methods with the females in a prone position.

His techniques were passed over to Ignatz Yoder who learned them well and traveled widely in the Americas to help the most severely restless women. His fame spread, and more and more females sought his help. He wrote a book about his experiences and later cooperated with John Bonus.

Bonus, at first a very talented amateur, was protective of the tradition he had thus learned, and in early versions of his own book did not reveal how the most recalcitrant women were salvaged by the methods Cathcart originated. He did, however, always give Yoder full credit for his particular methods of gentling women. Finally he became convinced that it was better to reveal the secret method to the world than to risk its loss. That method is fairly faithfully represented in the novel and motion picture The Wife Whisperer.

Today, numerous "neighbors" and so-called "friends of the family" call themselves wife whisperers, often building on the work of David Cathcart, Ignatz Yoder, and John Bonus in the early 21st century. Although the work of these modern practitioners is often derivative and sometimes sloppy, the techniques are solid, and a reminder to all, of the subtle refinements that Bonus brought to the process.

His gentle humor, searching eyes and subtle hands have become the trade-mark of the modern wife whisperer. As has the much heard catch phrase, "What are you doing with my wife?"

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